Often, due to ignorance or overconfidence, we make uncomfortable comments or questions, without realizing it. In this post we have compiled some of the most frequent.
So… How is the treatment going? Never be the first to bring up the subject and less in family gatherings or before other persons. If they want to talk or tell you something, they will do it, but they must be the ones who take the step and at the time they consider more appropriate.
How long have you been trying? Do not even think about it. Most people who turn to assisted reproduction have gone through a difficult period before making the decision, and if the duration of treatment lengthens, the process can create anxiety. Moreover, the data itself is not decisive since only the doctor or themselves can assess whether it is little or much time.
And what about adopting? Probably they have considered that possibility, and if they have decided not to do it, it will be for some reason, that they do not have to explain. In addition, there may be a difference of opinion between the couple and bringing up the subject will only contribute to increase tension and doubts.
Just relax and you’ll see! It is the typical phrase that tries to animate but that does not help at all. Not everyone can do it. If you really want to make them feel more relaxed, think of activities that can favour it and propose them.
And if you don’t get it, then take it easy, it’s OK like that. No, it’s not. Any loss or resignation entails a grief. Not recognizing pain or trying to downplay a desire can make the other person feel bad and misunderstood.
Don’t give them your baby to take in arm. If you have children and you are in a family reunion or at work, do not tell them to take them in arm. Let them ask for it or do it spontaneously, if they wish.
With Toby you have enough! If they have a dog or other pets, do not joke with the idea that it is “their baby”. It is a sensitive issue and although they laugh and joke about it, it may not sit well with them.